from the diary of a charlatan

I can say honestly that for the past year and a half, very few week days have gone by where I didn't get some sort of comment regarding my weight - in a positive way. And this is fantastic, it has really kept me going sometimes when I had a hard time keeping faith in myself.

And today is one of those rare days where I actually feel "thin". It's not what I'm wearing - I'm actually weraing sort of baggy clothes today- it's my frame of mind. (and I really hope that somehow, some way, my frame of mind will transfer it's light feelings onto the scale tomorrow)

Yesterday I had one of the best weight-related compliments I've gotten. This woman said "I don't even rememmber you from before, I just think of you as one of the skinny people" Woah.
I don't know if I've brought this up before or not, but in the past couple months, my compliments have morphed from "you're looking really good" to "you're looking skinny"
Now, I KNOW I am not skinny. Skinny is one of those things that other people are but I never will be. I always say thank you, but I always think that they're just saying that to be nice.

Because I am a fat girl, and a lot of times, when people use words like skinny and thin around me, I feel like a big ol' fraud.